Written by James Maguire

Managing Director at Maguire Famiy Law

James has an excellent reputation in the areas of international divorce law and child abduction. He also sits on the Law Society's child abduction panel.

There is no automatic presumption that the children would stay with their mother if an unmarried couple separate. The focus should be on looking at the arrangements which best suit the children and always taking decisions which are in the children’s best interests.

Whether a father does or does not have parental responsibility can impact on the practical arrangements for a child’s care. This does not, however, mean that the father should be excluded from the child’s life.

The court has recently introduced a new provision which means that if they are asked to decide the arrangements for a child, the court shall presume, unless the contrary is shown, that involvement of that parent in the life of the child concerned will further the child’s welfare.

What can sometimes complicate matters is if the mother and the father have a different legal status in relation to the children. A mother always has parental responsibility for her child or children. This is not automatic for a father. Whether a father does or does not have parental responsibility can impact on the practical arrangements for a child’s care. This does not, however, mean that the father should be excluded from the child’s life.

What Is Parental Responsibility?

Parental responsibility (PR) is defined as all the rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which by law a parent of a child has in relation to the child and their property.

This includes all fundamental decisions as to what the child does presently and in the future; for example, where the child goes to school, what medical treatment the child can or cannot receive and what religion the child should follow.

The more significant a decision regarding a child’s welfare, the more cooperation and discussion there should be between the adults who have PR.

If a father does not have PR then this could make it more difficult for him to ensure the child or children attend medical  appointments or are enrolled at school, and he may find that he has to obtain the mother’s authority.

How Do I Know If I Have PR?

All mothers have PR.

All fathers who are married to the mother have PR even if their name is not on the birth certificate.

Unmarried fathers with children whose birth was registered after 1 December 2003 and whose name appears on the birth certificate have PR.

Those unmarried fathers who are not on the birth certificate or whose children had their births registered before 1 December 2003, do not have PR.

How Can I Acquire PR?

All is not lost for a father who does not have the automatic right to PR. It can be obtained in one of the following ways:

  • Entering into a Parental Responsibility Agreement with the mother. The agreement must be in a prescribed form, signed and witnessed by a court official. This is the most straight forward option, but it does require co-operation from the child’s mother.
  • Re-registering the child’s birth and having the father’s name added. Again, an element of cooperation from the child’s mother would be required.
  • Applying to the court for PR. This may be a stand alone application or it may be made as part of an application for a child arrangements order (see here for more information).

When making a Parental Responsibility Order the court will look at the father’s degree of commitment to the child, the state of the father’s current relationship with the child and his reasons for making the application.

  • A Child Arrangements Order providing that a child lives with their father (for any amount of time) also confers PR. Any decision taken by the court about where a child lives has to have regard to the child’s welfare.
  • Being appointed as a guardian either by the mother or the court, although in these cases the father will only assume PR on the mother’s death.
  • By marrying the mother. This grants PR to the father, even if the child was born before they got married.


The issues relating to PR and the rights of a parent can be complex. The law and court practice procedure can be difficult and it would be advised that where a person is confused about the rights they have as a parent they should seek family law advice from a solicitor.

There are no fixed presumptions as to who will care for a child or children once a relationship breaks down.  In many cases, it is about dealing with the practicalities first – for example, one parent may mainly stay at home to provide care whilst the other parent works long hours, possibly away for the family home.

Additional Reading/Resources

If you are facing court alone many people have found Lucy Reed’s book, ‘Family Court Without A Lawyer’ particularly useful.

You may also find our page on How To Tell Your Children You Are Divorcing – Recommended Books useful.

The Handover Book by Ashley Palmer is a unique and simple communication book for separated families. It will allow them both to always be aware of what is happening in their children’s busy lives as they go from one household to another. It’s a way of communicating the important things they both need to know about their children, while keeping your relationship as parents friendly and calm.

Charlotte Friedman has written Breaking Upwards – How To Manage The Emotional Impact Of Separation. Charlotte offers calm, therapeutic advice on everything from how to manage loneliness to letting go of grievance, and draws on illuminating case studies to answer questions such as:  How long before I get over this divorce? How do I tell the children?  How do I cope with the new partner in my ex’s life?


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